Fox News headlines v. real headlines, part 2425183.
The brunette part is really important.
Fun fact, our hair color reveals our place in pansexual society. Blondes are our record keepers. The great librarians, they collect, analyze, store, and distribute information to the rest of us. They are blonde because they reflect the light of knowledge. Those with Black Hair are our inventors. They investigate, produce, and teach new technologies so that we may thrive in future times. Their hair is black because of their frequent dives into the void of the unknown. Burnettes are our ambassadors. They interact with people, plants, and animals, forging bonds that can protect us when we are threatened. Their hair is brown because of their deep connection to the earth.
And as for redheads.
You don’t want to know the purpose of the Red Heads. But may their hellfire consume our enemies.
Of course it is.
ALL BITCHES THIS IS MY HOME TOWN TAKE A FUCKING SEAT WHILE I TELL YOU THIS STORY. GET A BOWL OF POPCORN BECAUSE THIS SHIT IS DOPE
IN THE 1940’S PORTLAND WAS PUTTING IN LAMPPOSTS AND FOR WHATEVER GOD DAMN REASON THIS ONE NEVER GOT FILLED.
IN 1946, DICK FAGAN, AN AMERICAN IRISHMAN WHO WROTE FOR THE OREGON JOURNAL, GOT BLOODY FUCKING BORED AT HIS JOB AND WOULD LOOK OUT HIS WINDOW ONTO THIS SAD EXCUSE FOR ROAD CONSTRUCTION HOLE. ONE DAY HE SAID “FUCK THIS” AND PLANTED SOME FLOWERS.
HE WROTE ABOUT THIS NEW FUCKING PARK AND SPOKE ABOUT HOW LEPRECHAUNS LIVED THERE AND SHIT. MOTHERFUCKING LEPRECHAUNS IN THE MIDDLE OF DOWNTOWN, WHAT THE SHIT.
HOLD ONTO TO THE EDGE OF YOUR SEATS BECAUSE THIS RIDE GETS EVEN BETTER. THIS PARK HOLDS A GUINNESS WORLD RECORD FOR BEING THE SMALLEST PARK WITH WITH INFORMATION SAYING “It was designated as a city park on 17 March 1948 at the behest of the city journalist Dick Fagan (USA) for snail races and as a colony for leprechauns”. MOTHER. FUCKING. SNAIL RACES. BITCHES.
IT’S EVEN BEEN PIMPED OUT OVER THE YEARS
HO HO HO MOTHERFUCKS WE CELEBRATE CHRISTMAS HERE
WE CARE ABOUT THE ENVIRONMENT.
THE BEST PART IS THAT IT EVEN HAD OCCUPY PORTLAND PROTESTERS
SO I HOPE YOU FUCKING LEARNED SOMETHING TODAY ABOUT TINY ASS PARKS.
And here’s half a year’s worth of pitfalling in dedication to my hatred of pitfalls.
I’d like to thank all the stupid villagers who planted these for me, their kind and hard-working mayor.
What do you mean, vet’s office? YOU SAID WE WERE GOING TO THE PHILHARMONIC!
Cyber-psychologist Berni Goode talking about Flow on Charlie Brooker’s How Videogames Changed the World.
Flow is extremely important. So, so important.
It’s what keeps some people sane. It’s what drives the world’s most skilled and accomplished athletes, the most intense gamers, the hardcore hobbyists, even many of the most talented artists, musicians and actors - flow is what you get when unstoppable drive meets an unflinching will and unlimited dedication.
Flow is being utterly, truly “in the zone”. And it’s one of the most amazing feelings there is.
This is why finding a sport, or a hobby, or a martial art, or a handicraft, or a new video game, or any skill-based activity that uses focus and requires practice and repetition is so beneficial for things like depression and anxiety and overall mental/physical well-being.
…this is something I’ve been cultivating within my life without understanding what it is or how it works.
this is how i felt playing Tetris Attack as a kid and getting 20+ chains
An altered state of consciousness
……………………………………… I feel like this is pretty much how I’ve spent my whole life through writing, gaming, and doing crafty things. And I feel like this explains a lot ……………………………….
"Where’s the key?"
"Maybe it’s on Goofy’s keychain!"
Alright, here’s something funny. These boys in my hall went outside in their undies to take some photos in the snow. Funny, right? They’re trying to get attention and it’s hilarious. Us ladies choose to do the same, we are wearing more clothing, and are doing the exact same poses. We are wearing as much clothing as is acceptable at the pool or the beach, at the gym, etc.
There is a serious double standard here— us girls have gotten responses like:
"What’s the point of being half naked?"
"*ahem* sluts *ahem*"
"What’s wrong with you females?"
Or worse, what my mother said. Her initial shock was apparently because she thought I was in my underwear, but when I told her I was in a swimsuit, she was suddenly happy I was having fun in college.
The idea here is that we are doing the same thing. When arguing this point with one of my hallmates, he said “But men’s bodies aren’t built the same, you don’t see girls getting pumped up over a topless guy, but how many guys do you think are gonna get all crazy over a topless girl?” Seriously? Really? Women don’t need to dress in order to avoid a reaction from men. You’re mad because you can’t control yourself? Men can pose in their undies in the snow without an issue because women aren’t going to go wild over it? Keep it in your pants, that’s your responsibility, not ours.
The double standards are killin’ me.
"Keep it in your pants, that’s your responsibility, not ours." Is literally one of the best quotes I’ve ever heard. Thank you.